Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Long week already.

Poor Jack is having such a difficult time this week.

Last fall, we had a family move in next door.  The second time I met them was when the oldest boy came to invite Jack to play outside. Those two boys have been inseparable since! They have spent at least two or three days a week outside in the yards or in one of their bedrooms or another.  They've gone for walks together, ridden their bikes in the empty parking lot across the street, and done their Christmas shopping together! They've just been INSEPARABLE and CONSTANTLY together.

Yesterday, our neighbors moved.  Now, they only moved about a mile away, and the boys will still get to see each other at least once a week.  But it's just so hard on Jack, who is used to being able to walk out the door and spend the afternoon in the yard playing cops and robbers with his best friend.

And since I am here, he takes it out on me, so that instead of comforting him when he is sad, I am having to punish him for treating me badly.

Pray for us.

I am so happy for our friends who were able to find a home that is better suited to their needs, but I am so sad for Jack, and I am so frustrated with his behavior.

I hope we get another set of awesome neighbors with kids who like to run and play, because childhood SHOULD be about running around and playing outside with your friends.

I am very thankful that we've had several months of being able to have that experience every day.  It taught me to let go a little - that I don't have to watch him every second of every day.  It taught him to PLAY, and have fun, and to not be QUITE so clingy and afraid to leave his mother's side. We're growing up, I guess. We're starting to recover from our past hurts and move forward.

We do have other friends in the neighborhood, but having this family sharing a fence line with me made it so easy for them to be inseparable.  Some days, when I am ill, even going half a block is daunting.  I definitely prefer being able to be at home when I don't feel well.  Yet, I don't want to keep Jack at home because I am not well.  Even though I seek the comfort of my couch and my living room, I know he doesn't always.  He wants his friends. He wants to play.  He wants to run around and be a superhero who saves the world from the evil Spoctopus from Jupiter!

And his mother wants an hour or two when she doesn't have to entertain a busy six-year-old so she can vacuum the floors in peace, or cook dinner without a million questions, or (SHOCK!!) read the NEWS!

My child is a lot like I am.  He wants to play, but not alone. He would rather sit in the living room with me, bored out of his mind, than go outside and play tee ball without a friend. I get it.  I can't even manage to clean the kitchen after he goes to bed without a phone in my ear or an audio book on mp3.  Even talk radio helps! There's got to be some sort of balance, though, between always being BUSY or having someone around, and never seeing anyone.  I guess we both need to learn the value of being quiet and solitary every now and then.

Anyway, that's our week so far.  We started reading the Hobbit together, and Jack is reading Danny and the Dinosaur for very first book report.  We're starting a nature study next week, which promises to be a lot of fun, and we're starting art, piano, and French this month too. I am trying to find a job that I can do (maybe from home? That would be ideal!).

In the meantime, by way of trying to make ends meet, I am asking you to visit my website, shop if you can, and share with your friends and family.  I sell several items (mostly hats) that I knit and crochet, and I am always open to taking custom orders (my favorite was a recent set for a baptism - gown, bonnet, sweater, and blanket).  I also have several home businesses doing direct sales primarily online with SoyLicious (candles, home fragrance, soy soaps), At Home (decor), LilyBean and Baxter (anything you can imagine - personalized), Kitsy Lane (jewelry - lots under $20), Spirit Lockets (customized jewelry), and Meredith Lily (more personalized, event/party supplies, etc - still in pre-launch phase).  Please check it out and tell a friend - all your friends! You can find my website at cloverandcross.weebly.com/